Cabaret Balkan
Why are you laughing at me?
You think it's funny? That I'm different?
That I'm mutilated?
Is that why you have come?
Welcome!
Tonight I will be...
fucking around with you kids.
Playing
Script
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Damn this lousy country. Anyone that had any salt
in his head fled from here.
And you return back?
Do you mind if I smoke?
Smoking kills.
Everything kills over here. If I was a taxi driver in New York
or Paris, I wouldn't smoke. Foreing ministers of 15
EU countries, demanded from
president Milosevic
to stop the violence in Kosovo. At the meeting with colleagues
from 12 mediterranean countries... Look.
They killed a taxi driver yesterday.
He got a bullet in his neck. So much police!
I have no idea what they're doing.
Look at this lunatic! Who gave you
a driver's license?
Faggot! What should I do with him?
Should I kill him?
Come in! Come and get warm. I'll take you to heaven,
baby.
Come, baby.
Let's go to heaven!
Good evening. There's no problem!
You can talk.
I'm really sorry. Let's not cause problems.
I don't have a driver's license.
Open!
Fuck it all.
Out!
Get out!
Get out you monkey!
Out!
What is happening here?
This cunt fucked up my car!
Calm down. Sir, please be nice
and step out of your car.
He doesn't have driver's license.
Get out if I tell you so. I don't have a driver's license.
I only have the car registration.
Will you get out? Will you go alone
or do I have to pull you out? Get him out,
or I will. Get out,
you fucking cunt! Out! I have a solution. Break the glass
and pull him out from front.
Calm down sir.
He got away! Does he live here?
Viktorovic? I don't know. We're from Bosnia,
they gave us this garage. Temporarily. There's no water
and they cut off electricity. I'm not asking about the electricity,
but about Viktorovic. The one that has that
idiot son, Aca. I've found it. Apartement 13.
Third floor.
Have you come to register the refugees?
Don't nag, woman!
Did you remember how he looked? When I see him, he wont look anymore
like he did as I remember him.
Calm down please.
Don't interfere please.
Here you go.
- Good evening. - Good evening.
Is Aco here?
Aleksander is not at home.
Where is he?
I don't know. He went out We'll wait.
God knows when he'll be back.
We're in no hurry.
- Can I help you? - No.
Would you like some coffee?
I'd rather have some liquer. Jovo?
Liquer will be fine.
Liquer it is.
Just a moment.
Here you go. To us!
Cheers!
How old is Aco?
Aleksander? 18. Almost 18.
The worst years.
- Homemade? - Yes.
Bravo.
Did Aco tell you?
Good, we can settle this.
What should we settle? Some things
cannot be settled.
I've been driving for 31 years. At 12
I nicked my dad's car. Until now I have
never let a single scratch on it. Until now! It's as it was new.
Better said, it was.
It's better then a new one. I took from my mouth.
Sveto knows. We'll settle everything,
Mr... - Jovan. Aco!
Jovo! Calm down.
Aco!
Aco, come out! Please don't, Jovo.
It's ok. It's ok.
Good evening.
Open! Where are you Aco?
Are you hiding? Running? Please Sir.
Mr Jovan, please. Why are you running?
Why are you hiding?
- I was afraid. - Of me?
He broke my car window.
I was scared shitless.
Did you see my car? It's falling apart.
It's no biggie. What's is falling apart? I'll show you...
- Jovan! - Go away, Sveto!
You shouldn't have ran away. You should have let the police,
make a report.
That's right.
The policeman came. I showed him my
car registration. Then he started screaming,
that he'll pull me out. He started jumping on the lid
and that's why I ran away. You ran like a pussy. If you don't have
a driver's license, you have your eyes at least!
You can see where you drive.
Do you have brains in your head? Do you know the traffic signs?
You almost killed me! He steps on the accelerator
and he doesn't care shit. I guard him like the apple of my eye.
Stevo, it can go up to 140 on open. 120. -140. -120 engraved.
I said 140. What is it, why are you looking at me?
What will we do now? Answer Mr. Jovan.
Why are you looking at me? Monkey! Do you have any idea,
what you have done? You fucked up my car!
You fucked up your car! You fucked up this apartment.
Look! You're locking yourself.
Everything will be fine. Everything will be fine.
It won't!
Let me be... You're mine, Aco!
Sooner or later.
These people aren't normal.
They're partying again.
And you? Where are you going? That's my business.
That is our business. Till I feed you,
it is our business!
Listen dad, I'm in a hurry. There's no hurry.
Sit down!
I asked where you were going.
I have some business to do. What business? Aren't you a bit
tired? Haven't you worked too much? Go visit my boss tomorrow
and tell him, whose son you are. Listen old man,
Such work is not for me.
What is good for you then? Balet? Go there
and don't disgrace me. Half of the country is unemployed.
People would kill for such a job, yet you say it's not good for you.
- What's good for you then? - I don't know.
Urban transport certainly ain't for me. You're a professor and you drive a bus.
How can you do that? I can.
Do I steal? Do I beg?
Are you listening to me? Can't we have a
single evening without screaming? How can I put her to sleep now?
How?
Leave me alone.
Sister, sister. It's not my fault,
if Mujo left you. He didn't leave me.
He had to.
Why are you looking at me?
Where is my cap? You can't find your cap?
The cap is all that matters to you. Everything will be fine,
we just have to find the cap. We don't have anything,
and he's missing a cap.
You're a bit lacking under you cap. Everyone
else seems to find their way around.
- They find their way around? - Look at us.
I can see how they find their way around.
I'd rather be a bus driver
then a thief and a criminal.
- Coffee? - Double.
I have to stay awake.
Night shift is killing me.
We're even out of gas.
Baby! Beer.
Give me two beers.
How are you Dimitrij?
I am good thank God.
Will you have anything to drink?
I've ordered beer.
- Do you remember me? - No. What happened to you?
I can't seem to remember you this way.
Don't ask.
Did you have an accident?
If only I had one. Cheers.
Cheers! Did you have
a car accident?
- Did you fall down? - No.
I didn't.
Did someone beat you up?
Yes.
Who? He'll be damned,
when I find him.
Don't you remember?
I didn't see him. He slapped something on
your head, didn't he?
Yes.
How did you know? You had a dirty business,
Dimitrij. Dirty.
Well you know... When we start beating up policemen,
everything gets fucked up.
Fucked up for good. How many are you?
60.000, 100.000? A lot of you
- for a city of million? Too many. - Not enough.
- What's not enough? - You can see.
He wore you out good.
Somebody really doesn't like you.
They killed the God in you.
- With a pole. - A pole?
And a hammer. A pole and a hammer.
Bone by one. The hammer weighed
7 or 8 kg.
Every single bone.
27 broken bones. Three compound fractures.
All the ribs broken. Broken skull.
Backbone injured.
That's not possible. They put me together,
but not good enough.
I'm not satisfied.
They took one of my kidneys. And the other one sometime works,
sometimes not.
You shouldn't drink at all.
But I drink.
I don't hold water at night.
As soon as I fall asleep,
I piss myself.
God damn him. I would be better off,
If I was ran over by a truck.
Bad.
Really bad.
How will I manage? Early retirement,
with no awards and medals. I'm not complaining.
I've survived my own. And as they say,
oldness - sadness. I don't need anything else.
Ask for Dimitrij!
I've broken bones of hooligans.
How many women have I fucked! I can't even count them.
And I still can do it.
Can't I, honey? Do you know you beat you up?
Who? Who?
I did.
- You're joking. - With a pole.
And a 9 kg hammer. I thought,
I broke 32 of your bones. You didn't resist.
You're lying.
You squealed like a pig.
Do you remember now?
Leave me alone! You found me in the car
with my girlfriend.
I don't' remember. You pulled me out and...
I don't remember. You fucked my mother!
It hurts! Hurts!
- Why? - I don't know.
For nothing, Dimitrij! You hit me with a truncheon between my legs.
Between my legs! What did I do to you?
I don't know.
I reported you, but nothing happened,
because you were a big shot. I lied for 2 days
in bed. The third day I got up, but I
fell back into bed. My balls were as
big as a watermellon. I didn't even dare think about
a woman. It hurts,
everytime I get an erection.
Can you fuck now?
I can't have children.
Will you have beer?
I'm paying now.
Why? Tell me.
Why?
Where are you?
Where?
Who are you?
What?
Come. Come here.
Slowly. Slowly.
It's only recreation. I promised to take care of
Jelena, when you were in army.
Which Jelena?
Which? Your Jelena.
I didn't take care of her.
I fucked her.
I had to tell you.
This has lied heavy on my soul for 20 years.
Today I made a decision.
Aren't you angry? At you? Do you have
a better friend then me?
I don't.
Who fucks Jelena?
They're only women. Isn't it so? Who got you your
first woman?
Who taught you how to play cards?
Who bought you your first record? Who smuggled you every weekend
from the barracks? Who put sugar
in your vans tank?
Who?
I did.
You. Who got you
your garage?
Who?
I did.
Who poisoned your Lesika?
You poisoned Lesika? We bought her together.
You trained her.
How did you poison her?
With poison.
You be damned.
Cheers.
I have a hard time telling you this, but your wife
has a lover.
What?
You fuck Svetlana?
I used to, not any more.
You must have quarreled.
So?
Crush my head.
Yours?
Cheers.
Any more of it?
Your son...
What? He doesn't look like me?
No.
What shall I tell you?
Nothing. Hit me.
You?
I can't.
I knew about Jelena.
You knew? I knew,
you would tell me someday about it.
It's funny to you.
To me it's horrible, kids.
Will you be nice to me?
Will you kiss me?
Of course you would like to take it from behind,
my Balkan swines!
I'm an honest son of a bitch.
Our virgin. Like a swine I
drag my heavy brain. I am
one complicated son of a bitch.
I don't give a damn! That's knowledge and magic,
experience and fantasy. I know the signs, codes, state
secrets, nature's alchemy. I could harly find you
burek at this time of hour.
Don't you have small change? I know all the main figures in Europe
and the gravediggers, Worms where there is chaos.
Ghettos of paranoia, hermetic circles,
exoteric circles. Chiromancies, schizomanias,
necromancies, metapomanthies...
How boring, kids.
Ethnic tension.
Civil war.
Fratricidal war. If you have a gapin wound, you should
pour boiling lead into it. Don't wait for me to do it.
Don't be sorry about anyone. If you feel sorry for anyone,
fuck him up until he dies. Because death is beautiful
and the world is absurd. Politics is insanity.
And I'm talking bullshit. I rather sit in my spot
and drink. Look at the sunset
in Dorcol.
I don't want to lift a finger.
That's all.
Mane, don't be full of it.
Why did you come?
I came to visit you.
To see how you're doing.
And how am I doing?
How are you?
Excellent, thank you.
And it will be even better.
And you?
How are you doing abroad? I came foremost,
to see Natalija.
Leave my sister alone.
I want to put right everything.
You haven't dropped in for 5 years. I had to return as
a succesful man, with money in my pocket.
I had to leave this shit.
It's too late.
What is too late?
Should I die here? To lose my life
because of some fucking politicians, that fuck you in your head,
and you keep silent?
That's true. What's up with you?
I only have one life.
You're right, Mane.
I have to see her. You've caused enough problems already.
I know.
What do you know? I know they threw her out
of the orchestra.
That's all you know? I have to see her.
I always knew more then you.
I have to see her tonight.
There's no light, Mane.
There's only candles burning
in this country. You screwed,
for coming back.
I screwed myself too.
We're all screwed. Should I drive all night in circles
do you know where you would like to go?
You just drive.
Drive.
Fuck! There's a million marks here.
Not a million. Several millions! Some millions for you,
some millions for me.
You're full of it! Do you know whose it is?
I don't know.
Why are you then so full of it? You musn't know for whom
we work, so don't shit around. Topi, what shall I do?
Don't cock around. The guy in front of you
cocked around, and I bit off his entire ear.
He yelled like Van Gogh.
Sit.
I saved this for you.
Thank you, Topi, thank you. Did you hear about the situation over here?
It's much worse. You've come to the wrong place
at the wrong time. Knowing the circumstances
of Kozaracko kolo from '68... We are from Kozara, Topi.
No shit. I've come to the conclusion,
that this is a special place. Right?
Right.
Everbody wants to get out of here. But the Balkan is a barrel of gunpowder.
That's very true. Figuratively speaking,
Balkan is behind the worlds ass. I call that the hemorrhoids
on the worlds ass. Working title:
Pretty bleedy. Subtitle: You're fucked
by me and people like me.
Why you?
Don't cock around.
Here, try.
It smells money and death. You don't understand anything,
you forsaken son. You mind if I smoke?
No.
- Do you smoke? - No, no. Don't we know each other
- from somewhere? - No.
- You don't remember me? - No. Didn't we meet somewhere?
Maybe on the train?
No we didn't. You drink?
No, thanks.
- You don't even drink. - No.
You will drink now!
Is there a special reason?
- There is. - Really? The moment I saw you,
I knew.
What did you know?
That I will sit opposite to you.
And that we'll drink vodka.
Where are you travelling to, boy?
Travel! Get lost.
Cheers.
Where are you headed?
I don't know.
How come you don't know?
I am on a run.
Why?
I didn't pay for the parking ticker. You're lying.
It's true, I'm lying. I killed
my best friend.
Why?
Because he fucked my wife.
Leave that alone. It's not mine.
Whose is it?
You have beautiful eyes. I don't trust women
with beautiful eyes any more. The moment I saw you,
I knew.
What did you know? That I will be sitting right beside you
and it wont be easy. You decided
where to step out, didn't you?
Where will you step out?
I don't know. Why?
Because I'm going there too. They should lock you up.
Certainly, only between your legs. Leave me alone.
No way.
Leave me alone!
Good. Ok.
What will we do now?
I don't know.
Where did you get this?
From Marko.
Which Marko? Excuse me,
when does the bus leave? You're asking me?
Yes, I'm asking you. It should have left
15 minutes ago. 15 minutes ago?
Yes.
Where is the driver? Over there. He'll come.
I know he'll come, but when?
Believe me I don't know.
What is he doing there?
Probably drinking coffee.
Drinking coffee?
Drinking coffee. He's probably drinking coffee.
The US administration
accused the Bosnian goverment, of preventing the return of the
Serbian and Croatian refugees. The accusation was made
on a conference in Sarajevo.
He's really drinking coffee.
Fuck this nation!
Everyone drinks coffee. I'll get old before you all
drink your coffees. If I was late,
would he wait for me? Like hell he would.
Wouldn't he madam? It would be a scandal anywhere else around the world.
Only we have a system like this. Bravo! Can I ask something?
Did you pay for the ticket?
Excuse me?
Did you pay for the ticket?
I have a monthly ticket. Madam has a monthly ticket.
Can I see it? I only want to see it
for a moment.
Why all the trouble with the ticket? The madam has a ticket.
I nice example for all. You don't need a ticker.
Why not?
Because there is no driver. No one drives here.
You don't need a ticker. The driver doesn't care at all.
He doesn't give a damn. He's drinking coffee.
He doesn't give a rat's ass about the bus.
That's why you don't need
this damn ticket.
What would you do with the ticket?
No system - no tickets. You want me to drive?
Do you? I'll start the engine and drive us
directly to hell. I'll set it off
and he'll come immediately. He drinks coffee
and he doesn't give a shit about us.
They fuck us.
They screwed us.
Isn't it so?
That's right. Do you remember, madam
how it was under the Turks?
How should I know that? How come you don't know?
We were under Turks for 500 years. Of course we were,
but I don't know how it was.
But you remember the Germans.
I don't remember the Germans. You don't even remember the Germans.
You forgot that war too?
That's what it's all about. Nobody remembers
anything. You need a new war,
god damn you. Shut up young man
and bite your tongue.
I should bite my tongue? I bit off half a woman's tongue.
She deserved it.
How old are you madam? Excuse me?
Hundred, aren't you?
Isn't it time for you to die?
Young man, calm down. We're tight.
They propagate too fast.
My God. Why do you call for God all the time madam?
Are you sick? You're pale. Maybe you have cancer.
It comes with years. You should be ashamed. I hope your
tongue dries up, I tell you. So, madam, I should bite my
tongue or should it dry up? Do you know what you want?
Does anyone know what they really want? You have no idea.
You're sitting here only for the drive. Now you're really
going to drive.
Young man, where are you goinig?
To hell, old one.
It works.
It really works.
We're driving.
Stop, god damn you.
Everyone is crazy.
This is crazy!
Drive!
Did you see that? Good, good.
You just drive. It isn't the worst,
that could happen.
Fuck it. Bus stop.
Asshole!
Madam, madam.
Madam, control.
Everything will be fine. Don't worry.
I will take you home personally.
No. Please don't. Please son,
we want to step out. No problem, mother.
Let me out too. Slowly, be careful.
Take care. Good night.
Open the middle door, asshole.
Open! Good evening. Do you need anything?
Shame on you. Is the jacket warm?
Yes. Does the wind blow through it?
No.
And the knife...? Does the knife let through?
It does.
You two would like to step out too, wouldn't you?
No, no.
Good. Do you get an erection,
when you see chicks on the street? Give him some money.
What do you want? Money? Are you rich?
No. Why are you spending money right and left?
I asked you something else.
You'll pay for this.
I'll pay for it?
You're out of your mind.
Fuck this nation. Nobody listens,
to what you say. Nobody understands,
what they are asked. Everyone answers
something completely different.
I will kill you all. I will kill you all.
Not to bat an eyelid. You just carry on whit you shit.
I have a simple question. Don't be a wiseguy.
Remember it: Do you get an erection,
when you look at babes? Now!
No. Now you're talking. I don't believe you.
Would you like to lick the floor?
No.
Good. Now I believe you.
Wise. The floor is not clean.
Good evening.
- Good evening. - Good evening.
I've been looking for a button like this for years.
What's your name?
Ana.
Ana. Nice name.
Do you have a boyfriend?
I do.
Is he jealous?
Yes.
And you? Do you cheat on him? Do you like to drag along
with others in dark doorways?
No.
Do you believe her? I believe her.
Don't interfere. Why are you being silly?
On spot.
Not city.
You sit here.
Ana, spread your legs. Come on, spread your legs.
Do you hear me? More. The man is old.
That's right.
Look!
Spread your legs!
Look! Look!
Are you getting a hardon?
You don't have to answer that.
But please, don't lie to me.
I don't want to answer.
That's right man, that's the way.
Was it nice for you?
I don't want to answer.
Good. Keep the button
in memory of me. Quiet, you monkey. Don't you see,
that I'm talking to the girl?
Call me sometime. Finally you came.
We have been waiting for you.
You will be...
Sonny!
Tonight I will explain you everything.
At our spot. I will, I will.
Please. Listen Natalija,
come tonight, please. Just a moment, then...
On the old spot.
Natalija, I beg you. Is everyone here?
Everyone.
As agreed. The rest after the job is done.
Yes.
Let it have some class. The Vienna Philharmonic
will envy us.
Right from the balls.
Excuse me?
I mean from the soul.
Oh, yes.
From the soul. Wait a minute, honey.
Something is not quite clear to me. Did he tell you to spread your
legs or did you do it yourself? He ordered me to.
He. I'm sorry. And you didn't look at him?
No. And you have no idea why
he looked at you all the time?
- I don't know. He didn't... - Stop it with
these macedonian jokes. Why did he look at you?
Only you?
Why didn't he come look at me?
There is no reason, is there?
Yes, that's right.
That's right!
That's right. Why are you doing this to me?
Let me tell you something. You start to lie before you even
open your mouth. You lie constantly. I don't lie.
You're jealous.
I'm jealous? Now I'm jealous.
Do you talk on the phone with him?
Do you date him? So you laugh
like two fools. You look at each other
like two doves.
Like rats.
You dance naked in the moonlight. When somebody looks at me this way,
my dear,
I fuck him "en passant".
And then I look like a fool. Everyone at the coffeehouse stares at you
and then you say that I'm crazy. When they look at you,
you like it.
You like it a lot. I like it!
You like it!
You idiot! Where are you going?
What? What? You know what?
What?
Fuck you! That's your speciality,
my dear. Come here.
Take me home. Lift your legs for me a bit.
Take me home. First we have to
clear something up. There is nothing to clear up.
Take me home.
You want me to take you to him? Now he's the one to blame.
Who's to blame then?
Am I guilty?
It's not your fault. He's not to blame. I'm not to blame.
Who's to blame? Santa Claus? He's not guilty? I'm not guilty.
Who is guilty then? Am I guilty?
I am guilty!
You're not guilty.
Let's not argue any more.
What did you do wrong?
May I help you?
Are you guilty of anything?
Have you got a problem? Are you looking for a problem?
No and you?
Then look for the problem.
Don't cock.
What do you want? Everything between us
has ended a long time ago. I don't want to see you any more.
You're making a mistake.
Natalija, am I intruding?
Yes, you're intruding.
Who is this monkey? It's none of your business.
It's none of my business? Tell him to take a walk.
Kosta is with me. And he'll stay here.
What do you want? We have to talk.
We have nothing to talk about. Kosta?
Don't make a scene. How are you, Kosta?
What did Kosta do to you? Who is to blame?
You're asking who's to blame? Ask yourself twice,
who's to blame. Who's to blame?
Natalija, let's go. Aren't you ashamed,
of showing yourself here? I am ashamed. I'm sorry.
I did a mistake.
I want to apologise. Apologise?
What's it to me?
Look at him.
I want to start again. How many times
did we start again?
Natalija...
Natalija, this time it's different. I have learned a lot.
I have learned everything.
I don't believe a word from you. Same story every time.
Same shit.
I'm fed up with you. Only I know how
I felt when you left. I don't... I don't want to go though
this hell one more time.
You're out of my mind, Mane.
You will never change. You could have at least left me a
message, a letter...
Anything.
You know I hate goodbyes.
You hate goodbyes?
I'm not young any more.
I don't have time.
Natalija, I'm going.
Kosta.
I'm sorry, Kosta, just a moment.
I beg you.
Symphony orchestra. Your symphony orchestra.
They're playing only for you.
For you only.
What are you doing?
Wait!
Idiot.
He drowned.
Because of me.
You're here, Kosta.
I'm here.
As long as we're alive and healthy.
Show us how it went.
Not now.
Come on.
Show us. Come on. Good.
How did it go? Who's to blame?
Let's see who's to blame.
I am guilty. I am guilty. The fish are guilty.
The rats are guilty.
I am guilty. I am guilty.
In the moonlight... When somebody is looking at you,
you like it.
You like it! Did you speak to him
on the telephone?
Did you run naked in the moonlight?
Naked in the moonlight. Like doves in love.
Like rats, like rats. You look at each other
like rats.
Tongue! Tongue!
I'm guilty. I'm guilty. When somebody looks at me this way,
I fuck him "en passant".
Bravo, bravo! En passant.
Bravo! Who's to blame?
I'm guilty. I'm guilty.
He's guite good. It was a pleasure,
to meet you.
Good night. They're so disgusting.
Shut up, shut up. Make way.
I'm taking her home. Get out of my way.
Come here.
Leave her.
Leave her alone.
What does anyone that has the honour
to meet Topi, have to do?
He has to sing him something.
I can't sing.
Maybe you're not aware of the fact that you can.
Come on, try. You better sing.
Listen to my advice. Do you know that one:
Toni, toni, clear sun. Clear sun.
I know it.
Let's hear it.
Even I could sing better.
Start from the beginning.
Take off your clothers.
Take it off.
Undress.
Go on.
Topi, please no. Please, no.
Go on singing.
Sing.
Not further, damn you.
Sing. Get lost!
Go home! Go!
Sing!
I've done singing.
Now I'll fuck you up a bit.
Sing!
Don't! We wo't argue anymore!
Ever.
Studio B news. Delegation of OVSE in Pristina.
The Reporters Without Borders protested against
the actions of police. Todorovic accepted a delegation
of students. Temperature...
What are you doing? Quick!
They're stealing cars.
Neighbout. They're stealing gasoline.
Thieves! Thieves!
- There he is. - Where?
There. Where are you, you faggot.
Here he is.
Kitty, kitty.
Over here, neighbour.
Kitty, kitty, kitty.
There he is.
Now I'll fuck you up.
Where are you going now, you punk? You steal gasoline,
do you?
We'll skin you alive! It's not my fault.
I'm not guilty!
As long as we're alive and healthy.
Corrected by jcdr